Fun things to do in Church

Un-tune the piano.

Find an empty seat, and ask the person next to it: "Is this seat SAVED?"

Toss around a giant beach ball before service, like at Grateful Dead concerts.

Ten minutes before it starts, find a kid in the front rows, hand him a dollar, and tell him to ask the preacher: "Would you rather be stoned or crucified?"

Start a wave.

Do cool things with the lighting.

Make up your own words to the songs.

Twenty minutes into the service, look at your watch, stand up, and say: "HEY. This isn't the wedding!" Run out quickly.

Eat dry Cap'n Crunch through the entire service.

Dress all in camo.

Place blocks of dry ice near the air ducts. Take off your shoes and socks.

Hide near the baptismal pool with a block of sodium. At the first mention of "fire and brimstone", throw it in.

Inflate balloons, then send them off.

Mark places in the Bible or hymnal with religious-themed Far Side cartoons.

Turn in the Bible to the Ten Commandments (Exodus 20: 3-17). Draw in asterisks and write exceptions at the bottom of the page.

Make the sun reflect off your watch into the preacher's face.

During the service, play with plastic dinosaurs. If someone asks what you're doing, tell them: "These are dinosaurs. They ruled the earth over 65 million years ago."

Discreetly position a number of bottle rockets on the floor. Discreetly light them.

Snicker every time the preacher talks about someone being stoned, especially Stephen.

Dip communion wafers in communion wine. Eat it and exaggerate on how good it is.

When they pass around the collection plate, drop in a piece of paper with Pat Robertson's MasterCard number.

Blow bubbles.