Random Short Takes
At the end of a long day of driving, we encountered roadwork. We were unsure which lane to use, and the flagman was no help; his signal light went up, down, across, and back again.
"What do you think he wants us to do?' my husband asked. We proceeded cautiously and finally drew abreast of the flagman -- who, we realized, was frantically warding off mosquitoes.
During a recent vacation in Las Vegas, a man went to see a popular magic show. After one especially amazing feat, a man from the back of the theater yelled, "How'd you do that?"
"I could tell you, sir", the magician answered, "But then I'd have to kill you."
After a short pause, the man yelled back, "Ok, then... just tell my wife!"
When entering a hotel where she and her husband were staying, Gladys, a devout Baptist, noticed a shabbily dressed man lounging idly in front of the newspaper stand in the lobby. She noticed that several men
stopped to talk to him and gave him a little money. He seemed so cheered by the encounters she impulsively put ten dollars in an envelope, wrote 'God Bless" on the outside, and handed it to him.
The nest day the man stopped her on the street. "Here's your $250," he said cheerily. "God Bless won 28 to 1!"
My partner and I were in our patrol car when we were dispatched to break up a domestic dispute. We spoke with the couple, and the problem was quickly resolved.
On leaving, I was admiring the craftsmanship of their turn-of-the-century home and reached for what I thought was the front door. Realizing my mistake, I was turning to back out of the coat closet in embarrassment when I heard my partner say, " . . . and if you have any more problems, we'll be in your closet."
For centuries, Hindu women have worn a red spot on their foreheads. We have naively thought it had something to do with their religion.
The true story has just been revealed by the Indian Embassy in Washington.
When one of these women gets married, on her wedding night, the husband scratches off the red spot to see if he has won a convenience store, a taxi cab, a gas station, or a motel in Florida.
Originally published March 01, 2005.
