You Might Be A Preacher If ...
Published Jun 24, 2003
You hesitate to tell people what you do for a living.
You've ever dreamed you were preaching only to awaken and discover you were.
You've ever wondered why people couldn't die at more appropriate times.
You find yourself counting people at a sporting event.
You're leading the church into the 21st century, but you don't know what you're preaching on Sunday.
A church picnic is no picnic.
You jiggle all the commode handles at the church before you leave.
You've ever spoken for free and were worth every penny of it.
People sleep while you're talking.
Instead of getting "ticked off," you get "grieved in your spirit."
You've ever been tempted to take an offering at a family reunion.
You read sermons to your kids at night instead of bedtime stories.
You'd rather talk to people with every head bowed and every eye closed.
You've ever wanted to "lay hands" on a deacon's neck.
You often feel like you're herding mules rather than shepherding sheep.
Your greatest joys have been in the church.
Author unknown.
You've ever dreamed you were preaching only to awaken and discover you were.
You've ever wondered why people couldn't die at more appropriate times.
You find yourself counting people at a sporting event.
You're leading the church into the 21st century, but you don't know what you're preaching on Sunday.
A church picnic is no picnic.
You jiggle all the commode handles at the church before you leave.
You've ever spoken for free and were worth every penny of it.
People sleep while you're talking.
Instead of getting "ticked off," you get "grieved in your spirit."
You've ever been tempted to take an offering at a family reunion.
You read sermons to your kids at night instead of bedtime stories.
You'd rather talk to people with every head bowed and every eye closed.
You've ever wanted to "lay hands" on a deacon's neck.
You often feel like you're herding mules rather than shepherding sheep.
Your greatest joys have been in the church.
Author unknown.
Originally published June 25, 2003.
