You're Now Officially a Presbyope!

Doug went to the eye doctor for an examination because he was having trouble reading the newspaper. "Now that you're over 40," the doctor told him, "you've developed a condition called 'presbyopia,' in which the lens of your eye can no longer focus as well as it used to."
Seeing his worried look, the doctor tried to be upbeat. "Congratulations!" he said. "You're now officially a presbyope!"
Doug leaned over and asked seriously, "Does this mean I can no longer be a Roman Catholic? That I don't have to go to Confession any longer?"
Originally published February 01, 2004.