Fessin' Up
A lone cowpoke rode into town and stopped at the local waterin' hole for a drink. The locals had a habit of picking on strangers and when finished his drink and headed out, his horse was missing... He stormed back into the bar, flipped his gun into the air, snatched it above his head without even looking and drilled three holes in the ceiling. "Fess up! Which one of you sidewinders stole ma hoss?" he demanded with surprising forcefulness. Silence... No one answered.... no one moved... "Alright, I'm gonna have another cold one here, and if ole Blue ain't back out front BY THE TIME I'M DONE, I'M GONNA DO WHAT I DUN IN TEXAS! AND BELIEVE ME, I DON'T LIKE TO HAVE TO DO WHAT I DUN IN TEXAS!" Some of the locals shifted restlessly. He had another beer, walked outside, and there was ole Blue! He swings up into the saddle and starts to ride out of town. The bartender wanders out of the bar and asks, "Say partner, before you go... I've got to know... what happened in Texas?" The cowboy reined in, turned back, grinned and said, "I had to walk home."
Originally published November 14, 2002.
