Only A Southerner Knows. .
Only a Southerner knows how many collard greens, turnip greens, peas, beans, etc., make up "a mess."
Only a Southerner can show or point out to you the general direction of "yonder."
Only a Southerner knows exactly how long "directly" is - as in: "Going to town, be back directly."
All Southerners know exactly when "by and by" is. They might not use the term, but they know the concept well.
Only a Southerner knows instinctively that the best gesture of solace for a neighbor who's got trouble is a plate of hot fried chicken and a big bowl of cold potato salad. (iced tea optional)
Only Southerners grow up knowing the difference between "right near" and "a right far piece." They also know that "just down the road" can be 1 mile or 20.
No true Southerner would ever assume that the car with the flashing turn signal is actually going to make a turn.
A Southerner knows that "fixin" can be used as a noun, a verb, or an adverb.
A Southerner knows that when you say "crack" the window you mean open the window up (in the house) or roll it down (in the car).
In the South, 'y'all' is singular....'all y'all" is plural.
And a true Southerner knows you don't scream obscenities at little old ladies who drive 30 MPH on the freeway. You just say "Bless her heart" and go your own way (unless you're from Dallas).
Originally published October 26, 2005.
