The Proper British Rail......

Aparrently there had been a woman on the train with a small dog. When the ticket inspector came round he told her she'd have to buy a ticket for her dog. Understandably galled, she replied that if she was paying for a ticket for the dog, the dog would be entitled to a seat of it's own. The ticket collector graciously agreed but on one condition; he pointed to the sign by the window and said, "just as long as he keeps his feet off the seat."
Originally published November 14, 2002.