You Know You are in Minnesota when:
For those of you from Minnesota -- laugh; for those who are no longer in Minnesota -- reminisce; and for those of you who are just lucky enough to know someone from Minnesota, maybe this will help you understand them a bit better!
"Vacation" means going up nort' for the weekend.
You measure distance in hours.
You know several people who have hit deer more than once.
You often switch from "heat" to "A/C" in the same day and back again.
You use a down comforter in the summer -- and gloves.
You drive at 65 mph through two feet of snow during a raging blizzard without flinching.
You see people wearing hunting clothes at social events.
You think of the major food groups as venison, fish and berries.
You carry jumper cables in your car and your girlfriend knows how to use them.
There are seven empty cars running in the parking lot at the Fleet Farm at any given time.
You design your kid's Halloween costume to fit over a snowsuit.
Driving is better in the winter because the potholes are filled with snow.
You think sexy lingerie is tube socks and flannel pajamas.
You know all four seasons: almost winter, winter, still winter and road construction.
You define summer as three months of bad sledding.
Snow tires come standard on all your cars.
A brat is something you eat.
You go out for fish fry every Friday.
You can recognize someone from Iowa by their driving.
Formal wear is blue jeans and a baseball cap.
You drink pop and refer to your dad as pop.
You were unaware there is a legal drinking age.
Your 4th of July picnic was moved indoors due to frost.
You decided to have a picnic this summer because it fell on a weekend.
You only know three spices: salt, pepper and ketchup.
You've seen mosquitoes with landing lights.
You have more miles on your snow blower than on your car.
The local paper covers major headlines on one page, but requires four pages for sports.
Your snow blower gets stuck on the roof.
You think the start of deer season is a national holiday.
You find zero degrees a little chilly.
You actually understand these jokes and you forward them to all of your Minnesota friends.
Originally published May 19, 2004.
