Job Ads
"ENTRY-LEVEL POSITION"
You'll be making under $6 an hour.
"ENTRY-LEVEL POSITION IN AN UP-AND-COMING COMPANY"
You're paid under $6 an hour; we'll be bankrupt in a year.
"AN UP-AND-COMING SOFTWARE COMPANY"
There's no chance on earth that we'll be the next Microsoft.
"PROFIT-SHARING PLAN"
Once it's shared among the brass, you get what's left.
"COMPETITIVE SALARY"
We remain competitive by paying less than our competitors.
"JOIN OUR FAST-PACED COMPANY":
We have no time to train you. (and/or) Please introduce yourself to your co-workers.
"NATIONALLY RECOGNIZED LEADER":
Inc. Magazine mentioned us in an article a few years ago.
"IMMEDIATE OPENING":
The person who had this job gave notice a month ago. We're just now running the ad.
"SALES POSITION REQUIRING MOTIVATED SELF-STARTER":
We can't supply you with leads. (and/or)
There's no base salary to speak of. (and/or)
You'll wait 30 days for your first commission check.
"SELF-MOTIVATED":
Don't expect management to answer questions
"WE OFFER GREAT BENEFITS":
After 90 days, you can join our HMO, which has a $500 deductible and a $35 co-pay
Originally published November 12, 2003.
