Ten Reasons Why You Need a Raise. . .
10. You take your paycheck to the bank and the teller bursts out in hysterical laughter and then passes it around for the other tellers to see.
9. The Red Cross calls and offers you emergency assistance.
8. Your only charge cards are for the Salvation Army, ARC, and DAV thrift stores.
7. You work full time and you still qualify for food stamps.
6. You empty out your piggy bank and then cook the bank and serve it for your holiday ham.
5. All you can think about morning, noon, and night is clipping those grocery coupons.
4.You file your income taxes and the IRS returns them stamped, 'Charity Case-Return To Sender.'
3. You set the world record for making $1 rebates to Young America, Minn.
2. You pay all your bills, put your remaining $1 bill into your billfold and it goes into shock.
1. You get arrested for taking coins 'out' of the fountain in the mall.
Originally published October 21, 2005.
