The Senility Prayer
God grant me the senility to forget the people I never liked anyway, the good fortune to run into the ones I do, and the eyesight to tell the difference.
Now that I'm 'older' (but refuse to grow up), here's what I've discovered:
1. I started out with nothing, and I still have most of it.
2. My wild oats have turned into prunes and All Bran or oatmeal.
3. I finally got my head together; now my body is falling apart.
4. Funny, I don't remember being absent minded...
4. Funny, I don't remember being absent minded...
5. If all is not lost, where is it?
6. It is easier to get older than it is to get wiser.
7. The only time the world beats a path to your door is when you're in the bathroom.
8. If God wanted me to touch my toes, he would have put them on my knees.
9. It's not hard to meet expenses ... they're everywhere.
10.These days, I spend a lot of time thinking about the hereafter...I go somewhere to get something and then wonder what I'm here after.
Now I think you're supposed to send this to 5 or 6, maybe 10, Oh heck send it to a bunch of you're friends if you can remember who they are. Then something is supposed to happen I think. Maybe you get your memory back.
Originally published November 14, 2002.
