Calorie Counters Prayer
Published Jan 01, 1900
The Lord is my Shepherd, I shall not want
He maketh me to do push-ups.
He giveth me whole wheat bread
He restoreth my waist-line!
He leadeth me past the refrigerator, for mine own sake!
He maketh me to partake of the green beans (instead of potatoes)
He leadeth me past the Cokes..
Yea though I walk through the Bakery I shall not falter for thou art with me;
Thy Diet Coke and Fresca they comfort me.
Thou preparest a diet for me, in the presence of mine enemies.
Thou annointest my lettuce with low cholesterol oil,
My cup will not run over!
Surely Ry-Krisp and D-Zerta shall follow me all the days of my life
And I will live with hunger pains forever!!!
Amen
Originally published November 14, 2002.
