But ever since I’ve known her, she’s been critical of me, both verbally and nonverbally. My house will never pass her white glove test, my meals will never pass her gourmet meal test, my children will never pass her perfect children test. And yet I still love her simply because of who she is. That doesn’t make it easy though.

She’s coming for a visit, and I’m anxious. I prayed about it because I want things to go well. Lord, help me to see her as You do. Help me to realize that my worth, my mothering, even my cooking, is based only on what You think.

As I prepared for her visit, God showed me that my mother-in-law is a love-starved, lonely person. With no one to take care of and no one to share her life with, her being is compressed into my family. Invite her into your dailyness, He said.

So I did. When she came, I asked her to help me make dinner. I asked her to help me bathe the kids. I questioned her about the problems with my rose garden. I told her I needed her advice on sewing the new window treatments for the dining room. With a smile as radiant as the sun, she jumped right in. I realized that everyone likes to feel needed.

While we may sometimes see things differently from our in-laws, God says our “every action must be done with love” (1 Cor. 16:14). He wants us to treat even our in-laws with love, kindness, and respect. If your in-laws are lonely, include them in your life. It might make all the difference in your relationship.