Day 332: 1 John 4:7–12

No one has ever seen God. If we love one another, God remains in us and His love is perfected in us (v. 12).

Somehow I don’t find loving God quite as challenging as loving a few others I’ve known. I fear they’d say the same thing. It’s with good reason that “Oh, brother!” is a common figure of speech for frustration. Our most serious challenges are usually not with circumstances. They’re with people.

But exercising and strengthening the weak muscles of what I’ll call “otherly affection” is paramount to God. If I may be simplistic, it’s why we’re still here. So what’s a believer to do with all the challenges to love people we find difficult? Forget faking it. You and I are called to the real thing. While loving others God places in our paths will never cease to be challenging, the key is learning to draw from the resource of God’s own agapao rather than our own small and selfish supply of natural phileo or fondness. Agapao is many things we imagine as love, but two primary elements set it apart.

Agapao begins with the will. It is volitional love. In other words, the beginning of true love is the willful decision to agree with God about that person and choose to love. Secondly, when Scripture makes a distinction between agapao and phileo, agapao love is based on best interest while phileo love is based on common interests. Phileo love often originates through preference and taste, as in a naturally developed friendship or sisterly relationship. Agapao tends to be the more “expensive” love because the element of sacrifice is part of its nature. It’s simply harder. It necessitates will over emotion.

God’s chief goal is to deepen each of our relationships with Him. And He knows that if we don’t see our need for Him, we will never understand how sufficient and wonderful He is. Therefore, He continually challenges us to live beyond our natural abilities. He knows that challenges like loving someone we find difficult will place the obedient in the position to come to Him constantly for a fresh supply of His love. We have to pour out our own toxic and preferential affections so our hearts can be filled with His affections. As we ask for our cups to overflow with agapao, the liquid, living love of God will not only surge through our own hearts; it will splash on anyone nearby. Glory!