Day 69: 2 Samuel 19:1–8

So the king got up and sat in the gate, and all the people were told: “Look, the king is sitting in the gate.” Then they all came into the king’s presence (v. 8).

Divided loyalties had left God’s chosen nation in an upheaval, and grief over Absalom was crippling and consuming David. Once again Joab stepped in. He went to David and said:

“Today you have humiliated all your men, who have just saved your life. . . . You have made it clear today that the commanders and their men mean nothing to you. I see that you would be pleased if Absalom were alive today and all of us were dead” (2 Sam. 19:5–6).

Joab was warning him that unless David started acting like a king again, everyone would desert him.

The next time I suffer a painful loss, remind me not to call someone like Joab for a sympathetic ear. Nothing is more natural than grieving a devastating loss, but David was met by immediate condemnation from Joab.

I think a pretty good rule for comforting a grieving friend is to offer hugs and say little. Joab did not confront King David as a friend, however. He approached him as commander over the king’s armies. He had the best interests of his soldiers in mind and not the emotional well-being of a mourning father. He had seen many lives stolen in battle. If we give Joab the benefit of the doubt, we could see a shred of humanity in his desire to see David cease mourning. If we don’t, we can assume his resistance to David’s grief showed his guilt for having disobeyed David’s order to spare Absalom’s life.

Even though Joab’s heart was wrong, David concluded his advice was right. He returned to the business of the kingdom. David also realized that his army had fought for him, and he could not have them return in shame. So he got up and took his seat in the gateway. The words represented a pivotal moment—the king became accessible once more. David was back—in his heart—if not yet on his throne.