Open Mouth, Insert Brain
Open Mouth, Insert Brain
My dearly loved brothers, understand this: Everyone must be quick to hear, slow to speak, and slow to anger, for man’s anger does not accomplish God’s righteousness. (James 1:19–20)
Patience Required
“Quick to hear, slow to speak, slow to anger.” Those words sound good as they roll off the pages of the Bible. But as a lifestyle this patient approach to relationships requires extreme sacrifice and the willingness to be hurt and humbled for the one person God has called you to love the most (other than Himself)—your wife.
A husband’s willingness to believe in the good will of his wife and to prayerfully think through his responses before answering goes a long way toward building a strong marriage.
Wise Words
James’s words were not originally spoken as good marriage counsel specifically. They were shared with the early church, a group of people suddenly thrust together in community—a people who hailed from diverse cultures, backgrounds, and religious systems, which meant there were bound to be disagreements among them. Nevertheless, his words are perfect medicine for troubled marriages.
Husbands are called to lay down their lives for the woman they married. In practical terms this includes laying down our egos and our desire to “win” arguments. It’s a matter of choosing by God’s grace to love unconditionally. Reacting with patience and grace is not the natural reaction, but it’s the right reaction. So choose to stop, listen, and respond with grace. When you do that, you become part of the solution.
Bottom Line
God calls men to respond to their wives with humility and grace.