Living Out “In Sickness and in Health” - Crosswalk Couples Devotional - June 9
Living Out “In Sickness and in Health”
By Vivian Bricker
“Do everything in love” (1 Corinthians 16:14).
When a couple gets married, they make the vow to love each other in sickness and in health. This means that each spouse makes a promise to the other to love them, whether they are sick or healthy. Whether our spouse is struggling with a virus, the flu, or a chronic condition, we need to love them. Sadly, many spouses do not take this vow seriously and leave the moment their spouse is severely sick.
While most spouses would not leave over a simple virus, there are many people who leave their spouses because they struggle with a mental health condition or a chronic illness. Leaving your spouse because they struggle with a chronic illness or a mental health disorder is not a valid reason for divorce. In fact, it breaks the vow made before God. Promising to love your spouse in sickness and in health does not only apply to certain times. Rather, it refers to every single day you are on this earth.
Managing and helping your spouse with a chronic illness or a mental health disorder can be extremely difficult at times, but you have to remember that you love your spouse. Even though they have these struggles, it does not mean they are not worthy of your love. If you consistently cause your spouse to feel unworthy because you distance yourself due to their illness, it will begin to tear your marriage apart. Whether your spouse developed a chronic illness or a mental health disorder after you were married or prior to getting married, you are still called to care for them.
In truth, your spouse shouldn’t be seen as a burden to your life. If we truly love our spouse, we won’t feel angry or bitter towards them when we have to help them. Instead, we will sympathize with their pain and help in any way possible. This is true for both chronic physical illnesses as well as mental health disorders. For the former, you can help them by arranging any medications, being supportive, and going to doctor visits with them.
For the latter, you can help them by talking with them about their difficulties, being a safe place for them, and attending any therapy or doctor appointments. These small acts of kindness will make a world of difference to your spouse. It will help them to know that they are loved, valued, and cherished. If you continue to neglect the well-being of your spouse by distancing yourself from their illness or disorder, it will begin to negatively affect your marriage.
The Bible tells us, “Do everything in love” (1 Corinthians 16:14). This applies to all areas of our lives, including our marriage. When we are serving our spouse and helping them as they are dealing with viruses, long-term chronic illnesses, or mental health disorders, we need to love them. If we follow 1 Corinthians 16:14, it will benefit our marriage and bring glory to God through our marriage. If we neglect doing everything in love, it will show up in our relationships with our spouse and others.
If caring for your spouse in sickness and in health is a struggle for you, reflect on 1 Corinthians 16:14. Write it down and put it on display somewhere you can easily see it. This will help remind you to do everything in love and to love your spouse even on the most challenging of days. It can also be helpful to remember that your spouse has never left you without help or assistance during your days of sickness. This alone can encourage you to love them during their periods of sickness and illness.
It is easy to love someone when they are happy and in good health, but it can be hard when they are sick and in pain. However, we have to remember that love is a choice, and we have to make it every day. Someone who truly loves someone else loves them despite their flaws, shortcomings, or illnesses. They don’t run when things get hard. They choose to stay. As Christians, this is what we are called to do: with the same love God extends to us, we need to extend it to others, including our spouse.
“Dear God, please help me to apply my vow of ‘in sickness and in health’ with my spouse. I’m sorry to say that I have neglected this vow in my marriage. Please forgive me, God, and help me to start loving my spouse truly without conditions. It can be hard sometimes, but that is no excuse for neglecting my spouse’s well-being. In Your Son’s Name, I pray, Amen.”
Photo Credit: ©GettyImages/fizkes
Related Resource: The Stupid Mistakes That Destroy Marriages (And How to Avoid Them)
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Jim Ramos, founder of Men in the Arena, talks candidly with Arlene about his new book Guardrails: 10 Boundaries for an Unbreakable Marriage. They dive into practical wisdom for building a marriage that lasts, drawn from Jim's 34+ years of real-life experience. Jim has seen enough marriages crumble to know one thing: most of them didn't fail because of deep psychological wounds or unresolved trauma — they failed because of small, unwise decisions that compounded over time. Tune in for practical wisdom and ways to avoid these costly mistakes in marriages. If you like what you hear, be sure to follow The Happy Home Podcast with Arlene Pellicane on Apple or Spotify so you never miss an episode!
