How to Have Lasting Peace in Your Marriage
By: Gina Smith
For to us a child is born, to us a son is given; and the government shall be upon his shoulder, and his name shall be called Wonderful Counselor, Mighty God, Everlasting Father, Prince of Peace. - Isaiah 9:6 (emphasis added)
As a teen I remember desiring, with all of my heart, to live in a peaceful home. I vowed that when I got married, my home and marriage would be one with no fighting, arguing, or yelling. Peace was my heart’s desire. Peace was my goal.
After a rough first year of marriage, God began to show me that peace doesn’t just magically happen. The attitude and atmosphere of my heart was what had begun to characterize my home, and it was what was dictating how I related to my husband. In order for our home to be peaceful, I had to take the time to sit in the presence of, get to know, and become like the Prince of Peace.
In Isaiah chapter 6, When Isaiah announces the birth of the promised King, he is announcing the birth of the one who would make it possible to have peace in this sinful world. This announcement of the king uses four significant and important names. The fourth name he used was: “Prince of Peace.”
Through our Prince of Peace we have hope for a peaceful home, for peace in our relationships with each other, and most importantly, for peace with God.
The word prince means, “the head person, leader, lord, keeper, ruler.” The word peace (shalom) is much more than just the absence from conflict. It carries a greater meaning. One of well-being, completeness and wholeness. For us, it means that our Prince of Peace will bring deep well-being and right relationships.
The Prince of Peace makes it possible to have a right relationship with the Father – peace with God! This cannot be earned and is not deserved. It is only received by placing your faith in the Jesus as your personal Savior.
The Prince of Peace is also our only hope for peace within. The peace that is spoken of in John 14:27: “Peace I leave with you; my peace I give to you. Not as the world gives do I give to you. Let not your hearts be troubled, neither let them be afraid.” And in Philippians 4:7: “And the peace of God, which surpasses all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus.” This peace was made possible when the Prince of Peace was born.
If you take the time to talk with other couples, in the church and outside of the church, it doesn’t take long for you to find that there is a real lack of peace in marriages. Pastors and therapists are working overtime counseling couples with hearts desperate for peace.
We can only find peace with God and peace within, which then allows there to be peace in our marriages and homes, when we are immersed in the Word of God, allowing it to change our heart and renew our mind. We need our minds to be “fixed on Him” in order to be kept in “perfect peace.” (Isaiah 26:3) When our minds are fixed on Him, the attitude and atmosphere of our heart will be that of peace, and it will be what characterizes our home, and it will be what dictates how we relate to our spouses.
Only the Prince of Peace provides for us a peace that transcends all understanding, and our marriages can reflect that as we get to know Him, as we throw ourselves and the weight of every aspect of our lives, into the arms of our Wonderful Counselor, Mighty God, Everlasting Father, and Prince of Peace!
Gina Smith is a writer and author who has been married for 31 years to Brian, a college professor and athletic trainer. For the past 20+ years Gina and her husband have served on a Christian college campus as the on-campus parents, and her husband has been a professor and dean of students. They have lived on the campus where they raised both of their now married children. In her spare time, she loves to write, writes for several websites, and recently authored her first book “Grace Gifts: Practical Ways To Help Your Children Understand God's Grace". She also writes at her personal blog: ginalsmith.com.
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