How to Keep Trudging Through Marriage When You Want to Give Up - Crosswalk Couples Devotional - September 2

How to Keep Trudging Through Marriage When You Want to Give Up
By Lynette Kittle

“Does He not see my ways and count my every step?” - Job 31:4

Have we ever been on a hike or in a race where we had to keep going on the trail or route to get home, despite wanting to quit halfway through? 

Trudging ahead, we often face rugged trails and rigorous routes that twist and turn, change grade, and have loose gravel that tries to trip us up, along with trees, foliage, and obstacles that block our view, making it hard to see what's ahead.

In times like these, we need to cheer ourselves on as well and look to God to encourage us to keep going, leaning on Him during our weakest moments when we’re ready to drop in our tracks.

As well, marriage can sometimes feel like we’re trudging through it, struggling and pushing ourselves day after day just to stay married.

Trudging through Marriage

Although the word trudging may seem to have a negative connotation, it means to hike, trek, march on, to keep going, something many of us have done just to leave the mall after a long day of shopping.

It’s when movement trumps feelings, when we keep going forward in our exhaustion, putting our thoughts of quitting behind us, realizing that it will be worth it to push ahead once we reach our destination. 

Like a long, arduous hike, where at times we feel like we’re hanging by a thread of a cliff, marriage can sometimes feel similar, with feelings of wanting to give up, quit in the middle, and where thoughts of continuing on seem overwhelming and impossible. 

Times when we feel like we have no strength left in us to keep going, when exhaustion has convinced us that the only solution is to quit before reaching the end.

It’s during these times in marriage, too, that we need to look to and lean on the Lord to encourage and help us keep going, even carrying us for a while when needed in our weakest moments.

Keep Trudging

God calls us not to give up but to keep trudging, which applies to our marriages as well as to our lives overall. As 1Timothy 6:12 urges, “Fight the good fight of the faith. Take hold of the eternal life to which you were called when you made your good confession in the presence of many witnesses.”

Below are four ways to help keep us trudging ahead in our marriages, rather than giving up.

• Push ahead. Keep pushing one foot in front of the other in moments when we don’t think it’s possible to keep doing so, knowing it’s times like these that strengthen us and our marriages. It’s that steadfastness of not giving up that builds a strong and lasting foundation, one capable of supporting the weight of marriage. As the Apostle Paul urges in 1 Corinthians 15:58, “Therefore, my dear brothers and sisters, stand firm. Let nothing move you. Always give yourselves fully to the work of the Lord, because you know that your labor in the Lord is not in vain.”
• Ask God for help. Often, we’re slow to ask God to help us to keep trudging ahead in our marriage, to stand firm in our commitment to Him and to each other when we feel weak and without strength, but as Isaiah 35:3 urges, “Strengthen the feeble hands, steady the knees that give way.”
• Let God direct our steps. Rather than trying to figure out our next step, we can let God direct them, knowing His way is right and leads us to righteousness, as Psalm 119:133 urges, “Direct my footsteps according to your word; let no sin rule over me.”
• Fix our eyes on the goal. As Christian couples, we’re seeking to finish our marriages and life on earth well, to honor God in our commitment to Him and to each other, as Proverbs 4:25 urges, “Let your eyes look straight ahead; fix your gaze directly before you.”

As well, 1 Corinthians 9:24, reminds us, “Do you not know that in a race all the runners run, but only one gets the prize? Run in such a way as to get the prize.”

Dear heavenly Father, help us in our marriage today, strengthen us to stand firm in our commitment to You and to each other, to stay steadfast in our love for one another and to keep trudging, moving forward in our relationship, honoring You as we do. In Jesus’ name, Amen.

Photo Credit: ©GettyImages/LordHenriVoton 

Lynette Kittle is married with four daughters. She enjoys writing about faith, marriage, parenting, relationships, and life. Her writing has been published by Focus on the Family, Decision, Today’s Christian Woman, kirkcameron.com, Ungrind.org, StartMarriageRight.com, and more. She has a M.A. in Communication from Regent University and serves as associate producer for Soul Check TV.

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