How to Navigate Life After Your Spouse Has Passed Away - Crosswalk Couples Devotional - August 7
How to Navigate Life After Your Spouse Has Passed Away
By: Vivian Bricker
“‘He will wipe every tear from their eyes. There will be no more death’ or mourning or crying or pain, for the old order of things has passed away” (Revelation 21:4).
When we are young, we don’t often think about death. Since we are young and haven’t experienced the death of loved ones yet, it is easy to become desensitized to death. We rationalize that death will never happen to us. All of us will face death one day, and all of us will have to see our loved ones pass away.
The first time I truly was affected by death was when my dog, my mom, and my uncle all passed away in the same year. I never thought about any of them dying because death was never on my mind. I lived with rose-colored glasses until I saw death happening right and left in my life. When my dog passed away, I felt extreme sadness and pain. To live through each day knowing she wouldn’t be in the hallway when I woke up tore my heart in two.
Losing a pet is extremely hard because they become like family to us. My mom passed away about eight months after my dog passed away. She was only forty-five years old. I had often worried about my dad passing away since he is much older than my mom, but I never imagined that my mom would precede him in death. She had heart disease, but I never understood how severe it was until the doctors were explaining it in the Intensive Care Unit.
I was eighteen when my mom passed away, and it changed my life completely. Depression went to an all-time high, and I was at a loss as to what to do with my life. My mom had helped me make decisions, and I knew she would always have an answer to my questions. However, now, she was gone, and even if I called her, she wouldn’t answer. Mentally, this made me struggle a lot. I wanted everything to just be a bad dream.
Unfortunately, it wasn’t a bad dream. It was reality.
I had seen my mother pass away, yet my dad had seen his wife pass away. While my dad has never been an emotional person, he cried the day she died. I’ve only seen my dad cry a few times in my life and the day of my mom’s death was by far the most severe. There is something humbling about seeing your dad cry because you expect him to always be strong, yet you then realize he is just a person like the rest of us.
After my mom passed, my dad tried to carry on with business as usual, but I could tell how badly he was affected by her passing. Everything had fallen on his shoulders, and similar to me, his confidence was in my mom. She had always been his “guiding light,” and now his guiding light had gone out.
All couples need to be aware that their spouse will pass away at some point. While many husbands and wives are spared from this devastating event, it is only because they have preceded them in death. As Christians, we don’t need to fear death, but we don’t need to pretend as though it is not real. Death will come for each of us, and on the other side of death, we will meet the Lord and enter into eternal life.
Our passage today focuses on this beautiful promise. Revelation 21:4 says, “‘He will wipe every tear from their eyes. There will be no more death’ or mourning or crying or pain, for the old order of things has passed away.” This passage refers to the New Heaven and New Earth. Within the New Heaven and New Earth, there will be no more death, mourning, crying, or pain. The old order of things has passed away, and we are now entering into our beautiful eternity with the Lord.
The Lord will wipe away every tear we have ever cried, including the tears we have cried after our spouse passed away. Friend, your tears do not go unnoticed by Jesus. He sees them all, and He understands your pain. Turn to Jesus during this time, trust Him with your pain, and cling to the promises that are yours in His Name. You will see your spouse again, and never again will they be taken from your life.
“Dear Jesus, I am overcome with grief after my spouse passed away. Please help me to process my grief and to give all of my pain over to You. Bring Your promises to my mind, including the truth that one day, death will be eradicated forever. There will be no more mourning. I praise You that I will see my spouse again in Heaven. Thank You, Lord. Amen.”
Related Resource: 3 Simple Ways to Feed Your Spouse More Praise
How often do you intentionally stop to praise your spouse? To recognize and affirm their character or actions? Many of us probably cringe at answering these questions because we know we could do better! If you struggle to feed your spouse praise regularly, this episode is for you. Listen in as we share some practical steps we all can take to criticize less and affirm and build up our spouse more. If this episode helps your marriage, be sure to subscribe to Team Us on Apple or Spotify so you never miss an episode.
