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Why Is it Important to Continue to Date Your Spouse? - Crosswalk Couples Devotional - November 18

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Why Is it Important to Continue to Date Your Spouse?

By: Vivian Bricker

"That is why a man leaves his father and mother and is united to his wife, and they become one flesh" (Genesis 2:24).

After a couple gets married, it is not uncommon for them to stop dating each other. Since they are already married, they don't feel a need to continue dating. After all, dating is what leads up to marriage, right? In truth, married couples do not need to give up dating each other. Dating shouldn't end when marriage occurs.

Instead, husbands and wives should still be intentional in their marriage and plan date nights with each other. Due to work schedules and family life, it can be difficult to spend time with your spouse, which is why it is important to continue to date. By continuing to date your spouse, you will help them feel loved, important, and needed.

As a married couple, much effort, time, and energy needs to be put into the relationship. Marriage is not the end goal—it is just the beginning. Married couples need to spend time with each other, even when time restraints are tight. Prioritizing time with your spouse is important because they are your spouse. This reason alone attests to the importance of this person in your life.

Once an individual leaves their mother and father, they will unite with their spouse in one flesh (Genesis 2:24). This is not something to take lightly. Becoming one flesh with someone else is a significant step in life. Not only is it a major step, it is also a change. As a married individual, your priority is no longer your parents. Your priority is now your spouse.

God should always come first, and now, your spouse will come second. Before a person is married, taking care of their parents is their first priority. However, after getting married, their spouse becomes their top priority. This is a normal turn of events because things are not the same after someone gets married. While many people may see this as a bad thing, it is actually a beautiful thing.

Getting married and being united with someone else is part of God's plan for humankind. Never did God want us to be alone (Genesis 2:18). Therefore, as a married couple, you and your spouse need to put in the effort for your marriage. Being intentional, dedicated, and loving will help your marriage to blossom and bloom.

A married life without intention will soon cause your spouse to feel you do not care about them or are tired of them. Ensure your spouse never feels this way. You can do this by being dedicated to them, showing unconditional love, and pursuing them. Actively dating them will help show them that they are loved, you are attracted to them, and you are overjoyed being their spouse. Even if you are busy or short on time, you must keep the spark alive in your marriage.

Being dedicated to each other takes time, thought, and love. As you are trying to include these aspects into your marriage, take some time to go to God in prayer. By turning to God, you will be able to receive His help, support, and advice. God loves seeing two of His followers married and enjoying life with one another. He wants married couples to stay devoted to each other, to love each other, and to grow together.

Marriage was created by God, and in no way does He want you to start drifting away from your spouse. He wants you to be intentional and to pursue your wife or husband. By doing this, it will help them feel wanted and loved. Rather than living in a state of indifference toward your spouse, you need to ensure they feel cherished. In the twenty-first century, we have the privilege of choosing our spouse, and the spouse you have chosen is the one to whom you must remain faithful throughout your life.

Choose to start instigating a weekly date night with your spouse. If you and your spouse are active and adventurous, maybe a date night could be exploring a new city. If you wanted to switch things up, you could even have a date earlier in the day where you and your spouse go backpacking, hiking, or mountain climbing together. The night could be finished with camping and telling stories by the campfire. Spending a day together could deepen your marriage and help you reconnect as you did when you first started seeing each other.

However, if an entire date day is not applicable for you and your spouse right now, a few date nights can be equally as valuable. A few ideas for date nights could be going to a pottery class, seeing a movie, or taking a stroll through a beautiful park after dinner. Think about any ideas you have of your own and try to include those in a few date nights.

Marriage doesn't need to be the end of the road for couples. Instead, it needs to be the start of making your spouse the priority in your life, only next to God. By doing this, it will enrich your marriage as well as your life. Date nights do not need to be tossed to the side once you are married. In truth, they actually become even more important to your marriage.

"Dear Jesus, please help my spouse and I to continue to date each other. You have brought us together for a reason, and I never want my spouse to feel unwanted. Help me to be intentional and to continue to date my spouse. Thank You for providing me with guidance. Amen."

Photo credit: ©GettyImages/Goodboy Picture Company


Vivian Bricker author bio photoVivian Bricker obtained a Bachelor of Arts in Ministry, followed by a Master of Arts with an emphasis in theology. She loves all things theology, mission work, and helping others learn about Jesus. Find more of her content at Cultivate: https://cultivatechristianity.wordpress.com/

Untangling Prayer with Rachel Wojo Banner artRelated Resource: How to Make Your Prayer Habits Stick

Have you ever thought: "I wish I would have prayed first?" 

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Join Rachel on Untangling Prayer as she shares James Clear's 4 laws of behavior change and how they apply to our prayer lives. 

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