When We Just Need to Complain - The Crosswalk Devotional - December 19

When We Just Need to Complain
By Rev. Kyle Norman

“But as for me, my feet almost slipped, I had nearly lost my foothold. For I envied the arrogant, when I saw the prosperity of the wicked” (Psalm 73:2-3)

We all get discouraged or frustrated in our faith. Our spiritual lives rarely occur exactly as we would imagine or hope. We live in an imperfect world, and we bear those imperfections within ourselves. We all struggle. We all question. We all, at times, raise our voices to the heavens and scream, “why?” These experiences are not a denial of our love for God. They do not indicate a loss of faith or a deconstruction of our spiritual life. They are a natural part of our relationship with the Lord. This is why the Psalms are important for us.

Dietrich Bonhoeffer once called the psalms the “prayerbook of the Bible”; it is the place that we can go when we need to articulate the deep prayers of our soul. The psalms cover the full range of human life. In doing so, they show the normalcy of our questions and discouragements; they teach us how to voice our complaints honestly and faithfully.

Can we admit that, at times, we just need to complain about the unfairness of life? Like coming home to a spouse and venting about our day, we are invited to bring our complaints to the Lord. Complaining to God about our lives is not an act of faithlessness; it is a radical act of love and trust.

Take Psalm 73 as an example. In this Psalm, the psalmist reflects on the apparent ease and prosperity of the wicked while he, although faithful to God, languishes. Have you ever felt that? After all, mass media continually bombards us with new occurrences of prideful arrogance, violence, or oppression. The rich and famous as seen as the elite to emulate, and Hollywood boasts the good life. The world exalts these people as “carefree in the constant amassing of wealth” (Psalm 73:12). Is this fair? Hardly. Is this right? Absolutely not. Yet the deluge of media sometimes makes us dream that we could be like them. And underneath it all is the quiet lament that we feel so deeply, but never express: “how come them and not me?”

“How come? O Lord”, it’s a wonderful prayer to pray. It conveys the deepest feelings of heart and soul. The Lord is not offended by such questions. The Lord does not abandon us when we feel discouraged or dismayed. Our complaints do not discredit our faith nor do our struggles cast us from God’s good graces. In fact, could it be the opposite? Could voicing our complaints to the Lord unite us to him in a deeper way? God is the one who journeys with us in the messiest of places. Even when our own hearts fail, God is the strength of our hearts (Psalm 73:26). God is faithful to us, even if we can’t see it.

Intersecting Faith and Life:
Do you have a complaint you wish to pray through? Do you have a lament or a question burning deep within? Don’t swallow it up or deny it, keep it locked away and hidden. Instead, voice it loudly, faithfully, and boldly. When the complaints of our heart become many, or when do not know how to voice our laments to the Lord, the psalms are a guide for us. The Psalms give us the permission, and the language, to voice whatever we are feeling.

Leaving our complaints unexplored does us no spiritual good. To do so is to avoid meeting God in life’s unpleasantness. Thus, instead of avoiding these feelings, complaints, and questions, we should engage them. In faith, God invites us to risk meeting the Lord in the rawness of our lives, daring to believe that we will be received in love and grace. After all, why mask how we truly feel when the Lord knows it all anyway?

As Christian people, we are psalmists at heart. We pray for our joys and our dismays, our victories, and our struggles. Through it all, we rest upon the divine promise that the Lord is our refuge. Psalm 73 ends with an important reminder. “It is good for me to be near God” (verse 28). Being near the Lord means that we bear our whole lives before him.

Our faith is not lived through gritting our teeth and pretending that we do not hurt. Instead, we pray, honestly. We join in the psalms. Despite the ups and downs and twist-turns of life, we dare to believe that it is good for us to voice our complaints before God. After all, our spiritual life is not a Disney movie where things get wrapped up neatly at the end. No, we live real lives, and because we live real lives, we may have real heartbreaks, laments, or complaints. But our God is the God of real life, who dwells with us in the real struggles. So, if you must complain to God, then complain away. The Lord is with you.

Further Reading:

The Reverend Dr. Kyle Norman is the Rector of St. Paul’s Cathedral, located in Kamloops BC, Canada. He holds a doctorate in Spiritual formation and is a sought-after writer, speaker, and retreat leader. His writing can be found at Christianity.com, crosswalk.com, ibelieve.com, Renovare Canada, and many others. He also maintains his own blog revkylenorman.ca. He has 20 years of pastoral experience, and his ministry focuses on helping people overcome times of spiritual discouragement.