The Rich Blessing of Growing Old with Your Spouse - Crosswalk PLUS Marriage Devotional

He is (respectfully) honest at the expense of anyone’s opinions or feelings, so if you’re like me and have been in an unhealthy relationship before, one founded on lies and manipulation, honesty becomes more attractive than Hollywood looks.

And it’s a good thing that character qualities now outshine my young, vain idea of attraction being nothing more than a built body and pretty eyes. Josh and I are in our early thirties with a toddler and a newborn, so most days we look and feel anything but glamorous.

One moment, I’m covered in spit-up and smell like sour milk. The other, I’m splattered with mud, paint, or anything else my toddler can find. I have little time to shave my legs or wash my hair, let alone style it. I’ve also noticed the early stages of crow’s feet around my eyes and the forehead lines that have settled in.

The idea of looking both chronically exhausted and aged recently weighed heavily on my mind, so I finally asked Josh just how bad I look.

His response was simple: “If I’m being honest, I’ve noticed where you’ve started graying, but nothing has changed other than that.”

This was an answer I could handle. I could recover from this hard bit of truth. I am, indeed, graying, and I’m learning to treat these new coarse sprigs as my “streaks of wisdom.”

My husband started graying long before me, and if I’m honest, I love the gray in his hair. When I look at it, it reminds me of the steadiness in our marriage. Come what may, no matter the season, I have someone who has stuck with me. I have someone to not only lean on, but someone who will lean into the not-as-fun parts of life alongside me (and all my gray hair).

I often remind myself that earthly marriage is meant to represent Christ’s marriage to His church. It’s meant to endure. It was designed to last. As such, we can recognize that aging alongside our spouse isn’t just getting old with someone; it’s practicing and celebrating the loyalty that God gifts us.

Psalm 103:17-18 speaks to this steadfastness: “But from everlasting to everlasting the Lord’s love is with those who fear him, and his righteousness with their children’s children— with those who keep his covenant and remember to obey his precepts” (NIV).

When Christ is the one we strive to be like, especially in marriage, we find that growing old is a gift of promise, security, and joy. It’s a transformation made possible only by God’s gift of time. And what an adventure it is to share such a thing with the person God placed in your life for better or worse!

Let’s pray:

Lord, in a world that combats the idea of aging, labeling it unattractive and unwanted, may we see it as a blessing, as a heavenly adventure you grant us alongside our spouse. May we lean into your love and imitate your loyalty to the person we vowed our hearts to, God. Let us see each new season as an incredible opportunity to rest in the promise that what you have joined together is both beautiful and lasting. We praise you for who you are and for the joy you give us. In your holy name, God, Amen.

Questions:

1. How do you feel about aging? Discuss this with your spouse. If any fears, concerns, or frustrations come up, take them to Jesus in prayer, both as a couple and in your individual quiet time.  

2. When was the last time you added a little adventure to your date night, not letting age hold you back? Plan an adventurous date night with your spouse to celebrate God’s gift of aging together.

Photo Credit: Unsplash/Anthony Tran

Peyton Garland is an author, editor, and boy mama who lives in the beautiful foothills of East Tennessee. Subscribe to her blog Uncured+Okay for more encouragement.

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