“We must bear the ‘burden’ of being considerate of the doubts and fears of others.” Romans 15:2 (TLB)
Listening is probably the most important skill in building friendships and relationships. You can’t love people without listening to them.
But sometimes people run into trouble in their relationships when they think hearing and listening are the same thing. The truth is that there’s a big difference between hearing someone and listening to them.
You can hear something and not really be listening. I can’t tell you how many arguments I’ve had with my kids or my wife because I was hearing the words but not really listening to the emotions. Sometimes the words don’t even matter. Someone can say to you, “I’m fine,” but the way they say it tells you that they’re not fine. Listening means you also hear what the person isn’t saying.
When you listen that way, you’re showing empathy. Empathy means to put yourself in the other person’s shoes and learn their point of view. You ask yourself, “How would I feel if I were in that situation?”
Listening with empathy means you listen without interruption and you listen for what’s not being said—the feelings and fears behind the words. And you don’t need to try to fix the situation. In fact, sometimes healing comes just from someone listening!
Romans 15:2 says, “We must bear the ‘burden’ of being considerate of the doubts and fears of others” (TLB).
What does it mean to be considerate or to bear the burden of someone else’s doubts? It means that, when people are in so much pain that they don’t even know what they believe, they need the devotion of a loyal friend. They need someone who will be present and listen with empathy.
Rick Warren is an innovative pastor, renowned author, and global influencer known for founding Saddleback Church, the Purpose Driven Network, the PEACE Plan, and Hope for Mental Health. He has written several best-selling books, including The Purpose Driven Life, which has sold over 35 million copies in 200 languages. Time magazine named Warren the most influential spiritual leader in America and one of the 100 most influential people in the world. Since stepping down from the lead pastor role at Saddleback in 2022, Warren has continued to inspire people through his Daily Hope Devotional and podcast Pastor Rick’s Daily Hope. His first book in a decade, Created to Dream, was released in April 2023.
For more Daily Hope with Rick Warren, please visit pastorrick.com!
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Rick Warren is the founding pastor of Saddleback Church in Southern California with campuses in major cities around the world. He is the author of The Purpose Driven Life, which has been translated into 90 languages and sold more than 50 million copies in all formats. You can listen to his daily radio broadcast at PastorRick.com.
