Letting Go of Anger: How to Find Peace When You Lose Your Temper - October 18, 2025

“Let all bitterness and wrath and anger and clamor and slander be put away from you, along with all malice. Be kind to one another, tenderhearted, forgiving one another, as God in Christ forgave you.”—Ephesians 4:31-32 (NIV)

It was early Monday morning. Need I say more? 

The lack of coffee, the incessant chattering of the only morning person in the house, and the high-pitched whining from the younger brother, who is most definitely not a morning person, made my head hurt. I swiftly packed the lunchboxes and snacks, brushed the peanut butter toast crumbs off the counter, and wiped the peanut butter off my six-year-old’s face. School mornings are a whirlwind of preparations, hugs, and rushing the kids who are slower than molasses out the door. 

I often forget to check the school folders over the weekend, and this Monday morning was no exception. I reached into my older son’s backpack and unfolded a crumpled paper. Realizing it was the signed excuse he claimed to have given the teacher last week, I quickly snapped out of my early morning stupor. I lost it. I delivered a stern lecture with an angry tone, watching as tears welled up in his eyes. Immediately, I felt guilty for my harsh reaction, but I kept grumbling and complaining as I emptied his backpack. 

I hadn’t been awake for an hour and had already lost my temper.  Not only did I set the wrong tone for the day, but I also set a bad example for my child. I let bitterness and anger override understanding and forgiveness. I did a horrible job of disciplining my child with firm, yet loving correction, instruction, and appropriate consequences (Ephesians 6:4). 

But God always knows how to rein in my Southern Momma attitude. He gives me ample opportunity to practice the patience I always pray for and to be a good mother, just as I also pray to be. While still muttering complaints, I pulled out a white envelope with a golden seal. Typically, I set birthday invites aside until later in the day when I have the time to RSVP, but I was in fit-throwing mode, trying to get everything done. I broke the seal, lifted the flap, and “poof!” Confetti and glitter popped in my face and rained down all over my counter and floor. 

I just froze. My husband and son watched with wide-open eyes, unsure how to react in front of the Godzilla I had morphed into that morning. That’s when I began to laugh hysterically. A stomach-hurting, tears rolling kind of laughter filled the kitchen. God redeemed the tone I had set for the day. 

I’m sure you can relate to this story in some way. Maybe not the same confetti-popping ending, but we have all woken up on the wrong side of the bed. We have all started our mornings with a sense of crankiness and pessimism.

Undeniably, situations in life warrant justified anger, but we must not let anger control us. Offenses, especially those of a child, must be examined through our Father’s eyes. When anger dictates our response and actions, we must learn from our mistakes, seek forgiveness, and pray for patience and self-control. Keeping anger and bitterness in our hearts only gives the devil a foothold in our lives (Ephesians 4:27). 

We can lean into the teachings throughout scripture, especially in Proverbs, to cultivate patience and calmness. We can proactively choose peace over anger, setting a positive tone for the day. And if today didn’t start well, there is always tomorrow. His mercies are new every morning (Lamentations 3:22-23). 

Let’s Pray: 

Dear Father, thank you for being an ever-loving, ever-patient parent. Please help me to be slow to anger as you are. Teach me to have self-control over my words and actions. Convict me when my temper flares and allow me to surrender my anger. When I lose my temper, may I be quick to repent my sin. Let my loved ones have mercy on me by kindly accepting my apology. And let me be gracious to others who respond in anger to me. Help me release the things that trigger unjustified outrage. Make me a new creation, Lord. In Your Mighty Name, I pray. Amen.     

Photo credit: ©GettyImages/XiXinXing

Darcie Fuqua is an Auburn Grad (War Eagle!), Youth Director, Christian writer, and mental wellness advocate. She is from the deep south of Alabama, where she currently resides with her husband, two energetic, fun-loving boys, a beautiful niece, and a dog named Cinnamon. She loves sinking her toes in the sand, cuddling with her boys, and having great conversations over a table of good food. You can read more of her writing at www.leightonlane.com and connect with her on Facebook and Instagram. 

Related Resource: Soft Words for Hard Days: A Conversation with Aundi Kolber

Some days feel heavy. Some moments leave us wondering how to keep going. If you’ve ever longed for encouragement amid life’s hardest moments, I have a special episode of The Love Offering for you. This week, I’m joined by therapist and bestselling author Aundi Kolber to discuss her latest book, Take What You Need: Soft Words for Hard Days. This beautiful collection of quotes, scriptures, prayers, and gentle exercises is designed to be a balm for your most tender places—a reminder that you are never alone on your journey to healing.

In our conversation, we explore:
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