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Why My Way Is the Only Godly Way

  • Jenefer Igarashi Contributing Writer
  • Updated Sep 17, 2008
Why My Way Is the Only Godly Way

If I could have only thirty minutes of your time, I could show you scripture and biblical principles that would convince you that the only godly way to plan your family dinners, is to go strictly vegetarian.

Then we should talk about modesty. I know everything there is to know about modesty on account of a book that I read at last year's Ladies’ Church Retreat. We should talk about it, because if you haven't read this book, then you have no idea how ungodly you probably are.

Then I need to stress the importance of family planning. I can show you (in a matter of three verses from the Old Testament) that if you are not trying to have as many children as humanly possible, then you are not trusting God, and therefore could not be near as godly as someone who requires two full-sized school buses to get their family to church.

And did you know... courtship is far better than betrothal? Er… I mean, no, it's the other way. Betrothal is the way to go or your children will certainly end up divorced. Did you know that? You probably need the tape series on it – it’s alluded to in Scripture someplace.  If I can show you, then surely I will convince you. And, if by some chance you don't agree with me, then I will tell you: "That's OK, Honey, I was there too, once. I guess you'll just have to wait until God grows you in that area".

When you leave, I will call my "like-minded" friends and ask them their advice for you, and we shall pray that your poor household will not suffer the strife and pain you are surely bringing upon it. And I did try to warn you. You say you are a Christian, so how is it possible that you are unable to see these things that are just so obvious?! It seems to me anyway, that a true Christian who is sensitive to the Lord, and someone who claims to know God's word, would submit to these godly ways.

OK...ENOUGH! If you are unable to continue this article because you have torn it to shreds in sheer disgust, AMEN! The trend of devouring one another if they do not submit to our "standards" and personal convictions is not a new phenomenon, yet I cannot help but wonder if it is growing faster and more intense by the year/month/week/day! I see it so often. It must be Satan's best trick; really, because he uses it constantly, and we dumb sheep fall for it so predictably.

At every turn, it seems like a new "philosophy" is adopted into the church, and we all quickly grab a piece of it and then start stabbing each other to death. If you personally don't "take on" these new traditions or convictions, you are coined "worldly" or "immature" or "weak brother" or even "foolish" or "unsaved.”

1 Thessalonians 4:11, KJV: “… and that ye study to be quiet, and to do your own business, and to work with your own hands, as we commanded you.”

1 Timothy 5:13, KJV (talking about young women becoming idle after being made widows): “ And withal they learn to be idle, wandering about from house to house; and not only idle, but tattlers also and busybodies, speaking things which they ought not.”

Stick with me; I am going somewhere with this...

1 Corinthians 3:3, talking about divisions in the church, says, “For ye are yet carnal: for whereas there is among you envying, and strife, and divisions, are ye not carnal, and walk as men?”

Scripture is so clear on the matter of "gray areas,” where no explicit sin is named, that we are to mind our own business, keep the matter to ourselves, and certainly not sit in self-righteous judgment over others.

Homeschooling has been a precious gift to me. I have been so blessed by it, as have others. Yet, I have seen families, and even more than one church being wrought with division over it. I implore you (and myself!) to guard ourselves, our families, and for goodness sake, our mouths! There are so many different methods of educating our children. And all of these different positions have points that can be argued for or against.

As individual families we have the responsibility of making decisions for our own children. We are not responsible for Jane Smith's family down the street. We are responsible for seeking God and being fully convinced that what we have chosen is right. We are not on a mission to seek out other families, convincing them that their way is wrong. Public school, charter school, private Christian school, independent homeschool, classical, principle, unit study, unschool, afterschool, beforeschool, year-round school, slow paced learning, high standard academics, accelerated learning....Whatever.

If the method or the approach becomes more important than loving your brother, and begins to cause division or exclusionary treatment, there is a big problem. If you believe that you are godlier, or that you love your children more than the mom who has her child in public school, then you may have become a Pharisee. You may be guilty of loving the Law rather than the One who nailed that Law to the cross.

As Christians, we are strangers in this world, only passing through. It is so easy to get caught up into useless debates that do nothing to encourage loving God or loving others. And I stress "useless debates" in these "gray area" issues where a genuine sin cannot be named. I speak this to myself, as I just as easily fall into talk which only edifies and glorifies myself and the "right" philosophies I hold dear, and shake my head at others who "just don't get it." How ugly! How divisive! How displeasing to my God, who consequently is their God as well. Will He not defend His child that I am judging so harshly?

God help me! We are in this together. I pray we would build each other up, and that the world would see that we are Christians by our great love for one another. Do we discuss different issues? By all means! Do we give our opinions? Absolutely! Do we divide, or set ourselves apart, or become exclusionary? If we claim Christ, we cannot. We are teachers; our children are very quick to pick up (and emulate) the way we deal with one another. God bless you as you seek Him for the decisions you make for you and your dear family.


Jenefer Igarashi lives in East TN with her husband, Geoff the Great; together they homeschool their six kids on a little farm.  She can be contacted by email,, or thru her blog,