A Message to the Moms of Preschoolers
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- Updated Oct 09, 2023
Magical is the first word that comes to mind when I think of preschoolers, toddlers, and babies. These years are packed with growth, change, wonder, joy, and so much silliness! Everything from those first toothless laughs to the big wins like being potty trained or learning how to spell your name feels like magic.
Alongside those precious snuggles, perfect first curls, and bathtime escapades come a lot of work for mom. This age requires carrying, feeding, quieting, chasing, training, relentless redirecting, and lots of interrupted sleep. So much intensity is felt, physically and emotionally, while raising those babies to school-aged kiddos and beyond.
My first go around with babies, I had two little boys 20 months apart and then a sweet daughter just two and half years after that. There were babies everywhere! Watching them grow almost hurt; this season was so precious. Now I can see that mothering these first three preschoolers and younger also was one of the most exhausting seasons of my life.
I am again in a season of mothering two toddlers alongside my three older kiddos. I am feeling exhaustion creeping in. When we embraced saying ‘yes’ to more kids, I started out with a baby on my hip and was feeling confident. I was at baby number four. I felt like I finally figured out how to have it all! Love them well, be rested, nourished, exercise, and a loving wife. I felt I could do it better than ever before!
Now that baby is at the fun age of two, and we added a sweet three-year-old girl to the crew, making five kids in total, the emotional load of the big ups and downs that toddlers experience in a day is wearing me out. I’ve gained weight, lost my temper more than I’d care to admit, and am struggling to be there for all the people in my life. The reality is that this preschool phase requires all the patience and grace.
Embrace God’s Grace as You Parent Preschoolers
I am reminded that God’s grace is what carries me through these more tiring days. Through endless tantrums, potty accidents, spilled milk, foot stops, boo-boos, and more! These kids don’t need a perfect mom, they need one who is there for them, and who keeps going back to her Father God when she starts feeling unraveled by this job. Mom’s, we need Jesus!
Parenting little ones is a chance for God to show us more about who we are and what He is for us. Preschoolers' wide range of emotions is a mirror of what lives inside our grown-up hearts. Our reflex reactions to life’s curveballs are anger and frustration, and we lash out. Toddlers do this without any hesitation because they have not yet learned how to control their emotions. As we watch them and respond to them with grace and correction, we are reminded that this is what our Father also does for us. When we pout, run away, lash out, or just plain get it wrong, He gently draws us back to Him, showing us His ways and teaching us His paths.
Parenting Is a Chance for God to Teach Us
Parenting is about shepherding our kids' hearts but also about surrendering ours in a new way. We lay down our pride that says we are able to control others. We cannot control our children; we can only guide them. We lay down independence that says we can be all things without the help of others.
God made us in the context of community; we are here to serve one another with love (Galatians 5:13). We aren’t meant to carry the load of this parenting work all on our own. We ask for help, grab naps, go to the doctor, and put the kids in childcare at the gym because it takes a village to raise up the next generation.
Parenting also reminds us that we need to seek God for direction in our lives. We live in the generation of parenting books, blogs, videos, and more. We are all searching for the perfect way to raise successful children. Not that these resources don’t have value, but parenting is hard because what we need is a relentless reliance on God in order to guide His creation well. God tells us to ask Him for wisdom, and He will grant it (James 1:5).
In this new season of parenting, the Spirit is nudging me to pray in what feels like the storm in our home. When my daughter's emotions are out of control, and I’m about to snap, I ask Jesus to intervene because He is the only one great enough to help me to be the mom she needs and the only one with the power to heal the parts of my daughter's heart that have been broken. Looking back, I think God wanted me to go to Him so much more than I did the first time I was raising littles.
Moms of Preschoolers, Jesus Has You
The reminder is that this season is tough. You are not alone in feeling exhausted. Preschoolers are magical beings that take so much energy, love, and patience!
God wants to use this intense time to show you that He has you. He will gently lead you through this season (Isaiah 40:11). As our kids grow up, the challenges change. Some things get easier. They will sleep in their own rooms one day, wipe their own bottoms, and make their own sandwiches. But the need for Jesus to guide us as moms doesn’t change. We need His fresh mercies daily. So, the ability to lean into Him, while you are exhausted and unsure is a gift to carry you through the years ahead.
If you are feeling tired, just like me today, remember He is just a prayer away. Sometimes, just saying 'Jesus help us' is all we can get out, but He hears us. Ask Him for His help, His wisdom, and most of all His grace. He is faithful to provide. Jesus has your back.
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