A Single Mom is Still Married
- Lori Little Hope & Help for the Single Mom
- Published Sep 07, 2004
In an effort to reach out to single mothers in the Body of Christ, Crosswalk is posting a series of articles by Hope & Help for the Single Mom based on their CD set 21 Principles of a Healthy Single Mom. For more information visit: www.hope4singlemoms.com.
Is being a single mom a gift or a curse? If you would have asked me this question in my first few years of being a single mom, I definitely would have said it was a curse. I could make no sense out of the chaos of carrying all of the responsibility that I now had as a single mom. Part of that chaos was caused by wanting to be married. I did not like being alone again after being married for ten years and I did not like being a single mom either. All I wanted was for life to change, either back to the way it was with my family or to have a new husband. I had no idea how to be content just where I was at this time in this situation.
Because I was a new Christian at the time I became a single mother, I did not know scripture very well. One night while reading my Bible, I came across a verse that let me know that I was still married, even though I was a single mom. Isaiah 54:5 says, "For your maker is your husband - the Lord Almighty is his name." I came to realize that as a Christian woman, I am the Bride of Christ. After realizing this, my search for an earthly husband came to an end. I decided that I was going to enjoy having the best husband anyone could ever have.
Can you imagine having a husband that wants to be with you twenty-four hours a day and actually wants to listen to everything that you have to say? And how about a husband that never watches TV because the only thing he ever wants to look at is you? God is the kind of husband that wants to go with you wherever you go. And yes, that even means shopping! He wants to protect you and be a father to your children. He wants to provide you with everything that He knows that you need to be safe and secure in this world.
When you open yourself up to experience God as your husband, it makes you want to become all the woman that God made you to be. As a single mom, you know who your husband is and you won't want to go looking for love in all the wrong places. You will start treating yourself with respect and dignity; after all, you are a member of a royal priesthood. Your priorities will line up with what God intends them to be. You will want to spend time alone with God before you start your day with the children. You will put your children and home before your job. You will want to find ways to minister to others. You will have a positive attitude about the day and your future, for you know that God's favor is upon you. And your children will praise you for this when the day is done.
God wants you to enjoy this time of being single to experience all the love He has to give you and your children -- for it truly is a gift. When you learn to be content with God as your husband, you are free from all the concerns of this world. When you focus on pleasing God as your husband, the situations and circumstances you face as a single mom seem to become dim compared to the joy and happiness you experience from the love of God.
Lori Little, A Woman By Design ministry's founder, is the former Director of John C. Maxwell's THRiVE!, Becoming A Woman Of Influence. A major focus of Lori's ministry is the Hope and Help for the Single Mom initiative. Watch for Lori's book Hope and Help for the Single Mom, by Waterbrook Press, in 2005.
Dr. Charles Stanley says of the 21 Principles:
"If a single mom will follow these 21 Principles, there is no way for her to fail. She will watch herself grow in her own strength and abilities and become more confident as the leader of her home.
The 21 Principles of a Healthy Single Mom is a practical asset for single mothers to apply specific, workable, successful guidelines to her life."
