How to Consider Others Better Than Yourself
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- Updated Oct 06, 2023
Philippians 2:3 - “Do nothing out of selfish ambition or vain conceit. Rather, in humility, value others above yourselves.”
Yikes, that verse stings! Selfish ambition is kind of the default response for humans. We want to protect ourselves, be the ones to excel, and we want to be heard. It’s so hard to live against these impulses. I think we all can relate when Paul said I do the things I don’t want to! (Romans 7:15-20)
Yet, God calls us to practice humility. Humility is defined as a “modest view of one's own importance.” We are to see others as made in his image, valuable, worth encouraging, and most of all worth serving. We are not meant to always be at the center of our own lives. You can be confident and humble. Humility is the ability to see yourself in context – as a part of a family, community, workplace, marriage, and more. Life is bigger than just our own stories.
When we begin to overly focus on our failures, we fall into a different sort of pride that is hyper focused on our own abilities or lack of ability in a situation. We were not created to have all the answers or all the skills. Each person is different with individual strengths and weaknesses, and accepting the way we have been created is a part of a humble life too. The bottom line is that living with humility is seeing past yourself. It's acknowledging the needs of others and yourself. Humility says, “Not by my strength, but by your strength alone God.”
How can we live out the call of Philippians 2:3 and “consider others better than ourselves”? Check out a few ways the Bible guides us towards humble living.
1. Serve Others with Love
Galatians 5:13 says, “You, my brothers and sisters, were called to be free. But do not use your freedom to indulge the flesh; rather, serve one another humbly in love.” God by his grace has set us free! That freedom tears away the narrative that we are useless, broken, and lost. It gives us a new story in which we are called forgiven sons and daughters of God. God knows that this freedom is such a special gift and also that we need to use it wisely.
God’s word encourages us to take the freedom and other spiritual gifts we have been given and serve others when we use them. Service helps us see ourselves in the proper context. We see not only our needs, desires, gifts, and talents, but also those of others around us. Service gives us the chance to be the answer to prayer for someone else! How cool is that!
2. Study God’s Word
One of the most amazing things about the fact that God wrote a book to share his love with us and to reveal his identity to humanity is that it creates this incredibly real story that we can see ourselves in. It doesn't matter if I am studying the Psalms, reading the Beatitudes, or digging into the great miracles that happened in Exodus; in each piece of Scripture I can learn and see myself in the story. When I read God's Word, I can see how the Israelite’s lack of faith in the desert got in the way of seeing God’s promises fulfilled for the first generation that were freed from slavery. I too often struggle with believing what God says. How much am I missing out on because of my lack of faith?
God’s story reminds us that humanity is so limited in our ability. We quickly forget all God has done for us. Reading the Bible helps us to stay focused on the truth – a truth he reveals to us differently in each and every season of life. Studying the Bible also reminds us that we were made with a purpose that is much bigger than ourselves. We were made to worship God and to love others. When we focus our lives on these two things, we can start to practice humility so much more naturally.
3. Live Reverently Before God
The Bible tells us that we must live with the “fear of God.” Fear sounds like a scary word today, but what it means is that we are called to live humble lives before God. My son is researching Isaac Newton for school. One quote from Newton says that just the human fingerprint should be enough to convince you that God exists. Isaac Newton lived with the fear of the Lord! He understood that God’s power, intelligence, and creative ability is something that exceeds our wildest imaginations. Creation is so complex, perfectly orchestrated, and filled with such beauty – this could not be an accident!
We consider others better than ourselves, quite simply because God tells us to. When we live humbly and obediently before the Lord, then much of our actions come from a heart to follow him. He tells us to seek humble, quiet, service filled lives, so that is what our pursuit should be. A life of reverent obedience to the Lord is a humble one.
4. Embrace Self-Care and Intentional Living
This one may feel counterintuitive but it's a lesson I’ve learned over and over again as a mom and wife. When I am completely tapped out, I am terrible at remaining humble and kind. I become short tempered, self-focused, and impatient. Allowing my physical or mental health to deteriorate results in me becoming more of a burden to those I want to consider better than myself. We can’t always control what happens to our bodies and minds, but living with intentionality, doing our best to nurture healthy habits and create rhythms in our lives that include rest can go a long way in protecting ourselves from burnout and pain.
The Bible teaches that we are to rest weekly and that our bodies are a temple. Honoring God and others includes caring for yourself. Remember humility is not martyrdom, it's a modest view of your own importance. You matter. God loves you. He also loves your neighbor. You're called to care for both yourself and for that neighbor too. The story of your life is meant to be bigger than just you!
Humility for me feels like something we all struggle to get just right. So often we are either too focused on others or too focused on ourselves. Thankfully, God is patient and kind with us and continues to teach us his ways and show us his path. When our hearts are surrendered to Him, then we will continue to grow in humility and grace.
Photo credit: ©Getty Images/jacoblund
