Spiritual Disciplines Handbook

Conversational Prayer

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Conversational Prayer

A number of years ago Rosalind Rinker popularized group conversational prayer through her book Prayer: Conversing with God. In an attempt to stem some of the long monologue prayers that characterized prayer gatherings, she suggested a style of prayer that was more like talking with a friend than making a speech before a dignitary. Conversational prayers are not fancy or rehearsed; they are spontaneous, in-the-moment responses to heartfelt concerns. While we can have a conversation with God on our own, conversational prayer generally refers to a way of praying with others that invites everyone to participate. Children as well as adults are on equal ground when praying this way.

In conversations people listen to one another. In conversational prayer people don’t pontificate, expostulate and otherwise hold forth. They don’t cover every topic they can think of in one long prayer. Instead, as topics of prayer are brought forward, individuals take turns praying about that one topic. A prayer of a few sentences is all one offers. As others pray, participants listen and add other prayers as the Spirit prompts them. In due course the group will sense when to move on to another topic. Once again, they take turns praying through the next concern.

Conversational prayer is particularly meaningful for those who do a better job praying when they are with others than when they are alone. The simplicity and freedom in this discipline can truly encourage growth in personal prayer as well.

Reflection Questions

  1. What is it like for you to be in conversation with others?
  2. Do you like to think and then talk, or do you talk in order to think?
  3. How might your comfort level in ordinary conversation affect your comfort level when you are invited to pray with others?
  4. What is the experience of praying with others like for you?

    Where is it life giving?

    Where is it frustrating?

  5. How would you like to be able to pray with others?
  6. What benefits might learning to pray conversationally bring to you and your relationship with God?

Spiritual Exercises

  1. When you find yourself talking to a Christian friend about concerns of your heart, suggest that the two of you pray together conversationally.
  2. Invite your children to take turns praying sentence prayers. You suggest the topics, inviting them each to pray one after the other: pray for mommy, daddy, a friend, children who are hurting, teachers, people who need help, etc. • Ask them to talk about what it is like for them to pray this way.
  3. When praying in a small group, pray one topic at a time. Allow several people to pray about the same thing. Then move to another topic.
  4. When you pray with others, listen to their prayers. What do you see about God through their eyes and prayers? • How might something they pray give you more freedom in prayer? • Don’t worry if you are a beginner and want to follow examples of how others pray. Jesus told his disciples to copy his prayers. As you grow in prayer, you will gain greater freedom to speak.
  5. If you are uncomfortable praying out loud, ask someone who feels confident in verbal prayer to mentor and encourage you. Break your silence by praying with one other person.

Resources on Conversational Prayer

Too Busy Not to Pray by Bill Hybels

Learning Conversational Prayer by Rosalind Rinker

“Practices are the nuclear reactors of the Christian faith, arenas where the gospel and human life come together in energizing, even explosive ways. Practices create openings in our lives where the grace, mercy and presence of God may be made known to us.” —Craig Dykstra

Fasting

DESIRE

to let go of an appetite in order to seek God on matters of deep concern for other, myself and the world

DEFINITION

A fast is the self-denial of normal necessities in order to intentionally attend to God in prayer. Bringing attachments and cravings to the surface opens a place for prayer. This physical awareness of emptiness is the reminder to turn to Jesus who alone can satisfy.

SCRIPTURE

“When you fast, do not look somber as the hypocrites do, for they disfigure their faces to show men they are fasting. . . . But when you fast, put oil on your head and wash your face, so that it will not be obvious to men that you are fasting, but only to your Father, who is unseen; and your Father, who sees what is done in secret, will reward you.” (Matthew 6:16-18)

“Is not this the kind of fasting I have chosen:

to loose the chains of injustice

and untie the cords of the yoke,

to set the oppressed free

and break every yoke?

Is it not to share your food with the hungry,

and to provide the poor wanderer with shelter?” (Isaiah 58:6-7)

PRACTICE INCLUDES

  • abstaining from food, drink, shopping, desserts, chocolate and so on to intentionally be with God
  • abstaining from media: TV, radio, music, e-mail, cell phones, and computer games to allow space for listening to the voice of Jesus
  • abstaining from habits or comforts: elevators, reading and sports in order to give God undivided attention
  • observing fast days and seasons of the church year
  • addressing excessive attachments or appetites and the entitlements behind them, and partnering with God for changed habits
  • repenting and waiting on God
  • seeking strength to persevere, obey and serve
  • overcoming addictions, compulsions, whims and cravings

GOD-GIVEN FRUIT

  • keeping company with Jesus in relinquishment
  • praying for needs in the body of Christ
  • identifying and fellowshiping with Jesus by choosing to follow his sacrificial example
  • freeing up more time for prayer
  • repenting of self-indulgent, addictive or compulsive behaviors
  • letting these small deprivations remind you of Jesus’ great sacrifice on your behalf
  • seeking strength from God for obedient love and service