Covenant Group
Covenant Group
We are a nation on the move. People switch jobs, leave communities and turn over their relationships at an astonishing rate. Consequently we are a society with acquaintances, colleagues and allies, but no real friends. We may know how to work together to get things done, and we may be gifted in small talk, shop talk and weather talk, but we trust no one with the last 10 percent of ourselves. In a crisis we don’t know who to call in the middle of the night. There is no one we trust with our lives.
Covenant groups are a particular kind of small group designed to take participants to deep levels of the soul with one another. They provide a vehicle for continuity and development of relationships that attend to peoples’ stories as well as the hard questions concerning lifestyles, priorities, goals and spiritual well-being. Because the trust and safety needed for this kind of self-revelation takes time, covenant groups tend to be long-term and closed to people dropping in to try it out. My own covenant group has been going at least twelve years, though I have been a member for only ten of those years. (Covenant groups decide together when they want to bring in new members or split.)
As trust builds, members learn how to listen deeply to one another in the presence of Christ. They promise to encourage, help, support, challenge and pray for one another. Intentional spiritual nurture, care and listening are primary reasons for gathering. Therefore, the major portion of group time is devoted to authentic sharing by and prayer for each member.
Covenant groups may sign a written covenant that addresses availability, prayer, openness, honesty, confidentiality, accountability and so forth. Or the covenant may be a verbal promise to remain faithfully engaged with others on the journey. In either case the deliberate and intentional nature of covenant groups requires shared commitment. My covenant group has challenged me, corrected me, cried with me and held me in my pain. I need them to keep me on track.
At times covenant groups take on projects or ministries together. My covenant group consists of women involved in different ministries in the Chicago area. We decided that one thing we could do together that would incorporate our gifts and desires would be to lead a spiritual pilgrimage. So in 2003 we took thirty folks to visit the sites of the Spanish mystics. As we traveled together, we introduced them to spiritual practices of Ignatius of Loyola, Teresa of Ávila and John of the Cross.
Reflection Questions
- Do you prefer task groups or relational groups? How have your past experiences and temperament so inclined you?
Is there a group of people who really knows you and cares about you? What is that like for you?
- Which do you prefer: one on one, small groups, large groups? Where is your growing edge in each of these settings? How do you experience God in each of these settings?
- Can you imagine Jesus spending his life on a cell phone, rushing to meetings and never having time to answer a question he didn’t refer to his secretary?
- What kind of group relationships did Jesus value?
- Why did Jesus do develop a small band of disciples?
Spiritual Exercises
- Take an inventory of your relationships. Divide a piece of paper into columns titled “Allies,” “Colleagues,” “Acquaintances,” “Friends,” “Close Friends.” Name those who you know in each category. • What did you find out about your relationships? • What is God saying to you about this?
- Who would you like to grow with in your spiritual life? Pray for God to bring a few names to mind. Contact these people and see if they are willing to meet together regularly to share the journey.
- Take a closer look at how you interact in groups. How do you think others would describe your group participation: a good team player, a good listener, an authentic participant, a control person? Ask people who are in small group settings with you to give you their perspective on what you are like in a group. • Offer yourself to God and ask to become a growing, teachable participant rather than an independent operator.
Resources on Covenant Groups
A Spiritual Formation Workbook by James Bryan Smith
Companions in Christ by Adele Gonzalez, E. Glenn Hinson, Rueben P. Job, Marjorie J. Thompson, Wendy M. Wright and Gerrit Scott Dawson
“Spiritual discipline, then, is developing soul reflexes so that we know how to live. We discipline ourselves to develop soul memory in normal times so that we’ll be equipped for the times of high demand or deep crisis.” —Douglas Rumford
Discipling
DESIRE | to be in a relationship where I am encouraged or where I encourage another to become an apprentice of Jesus |
DEFINITION | Discipling is the process of equipping, training and encouraging another in his or her apprenticeship to Jesus. It means journeying with and helping another to grow in knowledge as well as in the virtues and character of Christ. |
SCRIPTURE | “So then, brothers, stand firm and hold to the teachings we passed on to you, whether by word of mouth or by letter.” (2 Thessalonians 2:15) “Make it your ambition to lead a quiet life, to mind your own business and to work with your hands, just as we told you, so that your daily life may win the respect of outsiders and so that you will not be dependent on anybody.” (1 Thessalonians 4:11) “Go out and train everyone you meet, far and near, in this way of life, marking them by baptism in the threefold name: Father, Son, and Holy Spirit.” (Matthew 28:19 The Message) “I no longer call you servants, because a servant does not know his master’s business. Instead, I have called your friends, for everything that I learned from my Father I have made known to you.” (John 15:15) |
PRACTICE INCLUDES |
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GOD-GIVEN FRUIT |
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