Secrecy
Secrecy
It is no secret that most of us do not believe in secrecy. Anonymity is not our thing. Recognition, accolades and the limelight are. We want people to know just how generous, smart, successful and popular we are. But we don’t want to appear to be a braggart, so we come up with subtle and socially approved ways of promoting ourselves and our image. We give money to causes where our name gets out. We name drop about who we know. We let slip how and where we volunteer. Every good deed we do sees the light of day. And every juicy secret we know comes out in our next conversation.
Jesus valued secrecy. On more than one occasion he told people not to tell others about things concerning him (Mark 1:44; 9:9; Luke 8:56). He also told others to keep their own secrets about good things they did. He said, “When you give to the needy, do not let your left hand know what your right hand is doing, so that your giving may be in secret” (Matthew 6:3-4). A deed that exists for the sake of recognition is not for God; it’s for you. Deeds designed to create an image or support an appearance can certainly bring about good—but they are not free gifts. They are deeds bound to what “I can get out of it.” God knows the heart of your deeds. He understands motivations and intentions. This being the case, admitting what is inside seems the only sensible thing to do. Reveal your naked self and secret motivations to Jesus. Develop your own private love relationship with God. We often plan special and intimate things for those we love, things we don’t share with others. Jesus invites us to do the same with him. We can do special and secret things for God alone—things that will delight his heart as pure, free gift.
Jesus was totally free. He gave gratuitously and graciously. He did not look for a return. He played to an audience of One—his Father. Secrecy stems from the desire to share confidences with God—to play to an audience of One.
Secrecy acknowledges that not all good deeds need public recognition. Furthermore, not all information is public information or appropriate for others to hear. We all have choices about what we say and don’t say. Secrecy is a way we make distinctions that honor God and each other. It is a way we hinder the spread of gossip, slander and rumor. Through secrecy we create safe spaces where people can freely be who they are without fear or dis-ease. Through secrecy we learn to give freely rather than for kickbacks.
Reflection Questions
- What is it like for you to keep secrets or maintain confidences?
Talk to God about this.
- How might the discipline of secrecy address an addiction to approval and image management?
- What personal and secret words of love has God said to you alone?
Do you treasure and remember them?
- What is it like for you to savor something you learn rather than tell someone about it the first chance you get.
- What is it like for you—and the person prayed for—when someone uses public prayer as a way to reveal secrets? (For instance, “Lord help Joe as he struggles with pornography.”)
How would the Lord have you pray for someone without betraying their confidence?
- How do you feel about anonymous gifts and cards?
Do you struggle with not knowing who has been good or generous to you? Explain.
Spiritual Exercises
- Covenant before God to keep confidences and secrets. When you are tempted to tell someone what you heard in confidence, confess that you have trouble keeping confidences and that you are trying to honor God in this matter. Then move on to another topic.
- This week choose to do something for or give something to someone anonymously. Ask God to help you discover who you should choose. As you talk to people, pay attention to any need they might mention. Plan a way of following through on your desire without letting them know where the help or gift came from. • Talk to God about what this is like for you.
- Savor secrecy. Let it be a way for you to love God and show him that he matters to you. • What can you do for God that no one will know about? Go and do it. • What is it like for you?
- Choose to keep a spiritual discipline you practice a secret between you and God for a stipulated period of time. • What is that like for you?
Resources on Secrecy
Spiritual Letters to Women by François Fénelon
Service and Secrecy by Jan Johnson
“In a noise-polluted world, it is even difficult to hear ourselves think let alone try to be still and know God. Yet it seems essential for our spiritual life to seek some silence, no matter how busy we may be. Silence is not to be shunned as empty space, but to be befriended as fertile ground for intimacy with God.” —Susan Muto
Silence
DESIRE | to free myself from the addiction to and distraction of noise so I can be totally present to the Lord; to open myself to God in the place beyond words |
DEFINITION | Silence is a regenerative practice of attending and listening to God in quiet, without interruption and noise. Silence provides freedom from speaking as well as from listening to words or music. (Reading is also listening to words.) |
SCRIPTURE | “But oh! God is in his holy Temple! Quiet everyone—a holy silence. Listen!” (Habakkuk 2:20 The Message) “After the earthquake came a fire, but he Lord was not in the fire. And after the fire came a gentle whisper.” (1 Kings 19:12) “There was silence in heaven for about half an hour.” (Revelation 8:1) “But Jesus often withdrew to lonely places and prayed.” (Luke 5:16) |
PRACTICE INCLUDES |
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GOD-GIVEN FRUIT |
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