Sometimes “happenings” occur in our lives that forever change the way we see ourselves. One of those “happenings” transpired when I was in Washington, DC with my family at the American Mothers’ national convention. What a thrill to represent Oklahoma as the 2015 Oklahoma Mother of Achievement. With the announcement that I had been chosen by the organization as National Mother of Achievement, I pinched myself to make sure I wasn’t dreaming. Sure enough, I wasn’t.
This last Mother’s Day I pinched myself once again because my son and his family from Hawaii moved back to Oklahoma. (Can you hear me squealing for joy?) For the first time, I celebrated Mother’s Day with my biological children and their children under the same roof. Then one word came to mind – something I realized I desperately needed: WISDOM.
How would I be “in” their lives, while still allowing them to live their lives freely, without my input causing a problem? How would I be able to juggle all the ins and outs of everyone’s family dynamics? (We all have them.) One thing I knew. Never before had I been needier of this one virtue: WISDOM – that is, the Father’s God-given ability to discern what every child and grandchild needed from me.
For all of us, whether we’re teaching a five-year old to share or modeling well to adult children, the need for godly insight remains at the top of our “to do” list as moms. Amen? Perhaps you’re like me, needing a refresher from God that he will come to your rescue with answers. I’ve wrestled with these questions as a mother many times. Have you?
- Lord, I don’t know what to do. Friend, God himself is full of all wisdom. We have a person to go to when we’re troubled. James 1:5 entreats, “If any of you lacks wisdom, let him ask of God who gives generously.” When’s the last time you inquired, “Lord, can you tell me how to respond?” The Holy Spirit longs to impart divine intelligence. I wonder if he’s waiting for us to ask? JUST ASK.
- Lord, I don’t know what to say. This one is the most difficult for us because we want to fix it. Yet, often the wisest thing to do is to be quiet. I like what Elisabeth Elliot expressed, “Never pass up the opportunity to keep your mouth shut.” Ouch! This is where praying for wisdom empowers us to do what we cannot do on our own strength.
- Lord, I don’t know how this is going to turn out. When it comes to our children and grandchildren, nothing causes sleepless nights more than stewing about their well-being. We think we can’t rise above it, but we can. John 14:27 extends Christ’s invitation of hope, “My peace I leave with you. Do not let your hearts be troubled.” I love that: do not be bothered, worried, or distressed.
- Lord, I don’t know which way to go. As a single mom, it’s scary doing life alone. There’s no one in the house after 8:00pm to ask for advice on difficult decisions. Yet, in those times, God intervenes as your life chaperone. Proverbs 3:5-6 assures, “Trust in the Lord with all your heart, and do not lean on your own understanding. In all your ways acknowledge him and he will direct your path.” We can rely on the Father as our earthly guide.
- Lord, I don’t know how I will ever get over ______.When we’re in the middle of the crisis, we can’t imagine our way out. All we see is the day-to-day circumstance that never seems to change or get better. My favorite verse as a single mom saw me through many days when I wondered if my troubled season would ever pass. With the hope of Romans 8:28, it did pass, with a mighty lesson tucked inside, “And behold, I work everything together for good.” Indeed, God is not finished with our stories.
These questions and more plague our minds, yet in them all, being a mom is the greatest privilege in the entire world. It doesn’t matter that Mother’s Day is only once a year, because every day is Mother’s Day. God celebrates us! And in our desire to do what is right, he causes our righteousness (integrity) to shine like the noonday sun that all might see him working in our midst whereby we can’t help but speak well of him (Psalm 37:34). That’s called giving him glory.
I can surely testify that through it all (the highs and lows), God ultimately honors the pursuit of wisdom.
Pam Kanaly, author of The Single Mom and Her Rollercoaster Emotions, nominated by the Governor for "Oklahoma Mother of Achievement - 2015 " and chosen as “National Mother of Achievement- 2015” by the American Mothers’ Organization, remains one of the nation’s leading advocates for single mothers. As founder of the single mothers’ conferences – Survive ‘N’ Thrive, Pam exudes with a God-given passion in seeing women know their value in Christ. She is the co-founder of the national organization Arise Ministries, having been featured on the 700 Club and other national programs. www.ariseministries.net
Publication date: May 14, 2015