When someone thinks of the words "friend" or "friendship," many things come to mind—loyalty, honesty, respect, support, and fun, to name a few. Friendships are quality, intentional connections people need to thrive in life. Friends are necessary for mental, spiritual, and emotional support to encourage personal growth and navigate challenging times. Friendship circles are valuable bonds that require a certain level of dedication and sacrifice for the well-being of others. One example of a friend, one who is closer than a brother and one who sacrificed His life for His friends, is none other than Jesus Christ. Jesus was the ultimate example of friendship at its finest. Throughout His ministry on earth, He exemplified how to be a friend, even with those He knew would betray Him. He exemplified how to persevere during trying times in friendship, and He displayed two of the most essential characteristics of being a good friend: love and forgiveness.
For singles, quality friendships are essential for many reasons previously listed. However, many single friendships are often rooted in finding or being found by a companion for marriage. While there's nothing wrong with this, singles need to understand how to be a friend and receive friendship beyond the scope of getting into a relationship. So, listed below are ten lessons singles and everyone can learn from Jesus' friendships.
1. He Was Intentional with His Presence
1. He Was Intentional with His Presence
During His ministry on earth, Jesus was intentional about being fully present in His friendships. He shared meals with them, guided them in ministry, actively listened to them, and cared for their needs. Singles can learn from Jesus' actions by learning to listen to their friends, care for their needs, and be fully present during social interactions and in times of need.
2. He Was a Trusted Friend
2. He Was a Trusted Friend
Jesus earned the trust of His friends by showing His love and dedication to their well-being. He showed them love and compassion as He walked side by side with them. He kept His promise to never leave or forsake them, even to the point of betrayal. Singles can model this form of trust in their friendships by dedicating themselves to the well-being of their friends. Singles can display love and compassion in their friendships by showing up for their friends in and out of times of need.
3. He Was Loyal to Them
3. He Was Loyal to Them
Being loyal is a characteristic Jesus mastered. He stood by and protected His disciples who betrayed and denied Him because of His unwavering love and dedication to their well-being. This trait of loyalty comes with forgiveness and understanding. Jesus constantly forgave His friends throughout His earthly ministry and understood that they were not perfect. Singles can display loyalty in their friendships by first emulating the way Jesus forgave and understood His friends. These actions alone will help foster a sense of healthy loyalty in friendships because singles can support and remain in quality friendships when forgiveness and understanding are at the heart of loyalty.
4. He Showed His Friends Love through Actions and Sacrifice
4. He Showed His Friends Love through Actions and Sacrifice
Love is patient. It is kind. It keeps no records of wrong. It does not envy. Love is so many things, but most of all, love is action-filled with patience and sacrifice. Jesus loved His friends. He loved them unconditionally, even when they doubted His love for them, He showed up for them. Singles, learn to show your friends the love Jesus showed His. You can call them to tell them you love them, listen to them in times of need, and encourage and celebrate them in any way they need it. Take some time out of your day to show a friend some love as Jesus did with His disciples.
Photo Credit: ©iStock/Getty Images Plus/PeopleImages
5. He Taught Them about Our Heavenly Father
5. He Taught Them about Our Heavenly Father
Jesus constantly taught about our Heavenly Father to His friends because that was a part of His mission and He knew the importance of teaching His disciples about Him. Singles, take some time to minister to your friends about the goodness of God in your life and in theirs. Use your friendship to witness to them about God's love for them in their singleness to serve as a reminder that God loves them just the way they are.
6. He Encouraged the Truth
6. He Encouraged the Truth
Jesus was open and honest with His friends in a loving way. He told them the truth through His teachings and parables. He was unafraid to confront falsehoods and call people out on their actions, but most importantly, He took the time to correct them with truth and love. Singles, it's okay to be truthful with your friends as long as you display the truth in love. When doing so, ensure you genuinely correct them for their well-being without judgment.
7. He Prayed for His Friends
7. He Prayed for His Friends
Prayer is essential to any believer. It is communication with God about anything that is in your heart, in your mind, and in your spirit. On many occasions, Jesus prayed for His friends, the sick, and sinners. Not only did He pray for His friends, but He taught them how to pray because He knew that prayer is the lifeline and direct connection with God. If you desire to be a good friend, then it is crucial to pray for and with them. While praying for your friends and their needs, be sure to pray for your friendship.
8. He Accepted His Friends for Who They Were
8. He Accepted His Friends for Who They Were
Jesus knew that His friends were imperfect beings. They were sinners who needed a savior and a friend, just like many of us. Although He knew they were imperfect, He loved and walked with them just as they were. Singles, accept your friends for who they are, where they are, and where they are going. No one is perfect. No, not even you. It's important to accept your friends for who they, and who they aren't. And don't try to change them into whomever you think they should be. Afterall, they accept you for who you are. Right?
9. He Did Not Focus on Their Relationship Status
9. He Did Not Focus on Their Relationship Status
During Jesus' ministry on earth, He was focused on His purpose. As He ministered to sinners, performed miracles, and healed the sick, not once did He mention marriage or dating to His friends. He was focused on His ministry. I know many singles believe their primary purpose in life is to get married and have a family, which is what many focus on. However, you should take some time to think about how Jesus never focused on His friends' relationship status, nor did He focus on His own. Take some time to encourage your single friends to focus on their ministry work rather than their relationship status. You should also focus on their ministry work, and yours as well. When you do this, you won't have time to focus on relationship status.
10. He Served Them
10. He Served Them
As a friend, Jesus served His friends and emphasized serving others. Jesus washed their feet, fed them, prayed with them, reassured them. He did this because He was exemplifying the humility of a servant's heart and setting the example of how others should humble themselves and serve others. Singles, how do you serve your friends? Take some time to think about how you serve your friends while you're with them and while you're away from them. Pray for them, help them when they're in need, help them with housework, or any task you see fit. Humble yourself and serve the ones you call friends, simply because one day they may need to serve you.
Jesus was the ultimate example of how we should live our lives in every way. He was a friend to His disciples who loved and cherished them because He saw the good in them. Take some time to reflect on the type of friend you are, and compare it to the type of friend Jesus was to His friends while He was on earth and the heavenly friend He is to us on earth right now. During your time of reflection, ask yourself the following questions:
-How intentional am I when I'm in my friends' presence?
-How do I serve my friends? In what way am I helpful to them?
-How do I serve them?
-Do I focus more on their relationship status, or their life in ministry?
-Have I accepted them for who they are?
-Am I a trusted friend?
-Do I pray for my friends as I should?
-Do I positively encourage them?
-Do I minister to them about the goodness of the Lord?
-Do I encourage the truth?
-Am I loyal to them?
As you reflect, answer these questions honestly and make changes as you see fit. Godly friendships are one of a kind and should be nourished as God requires. Singles, as you continue to build your friendships, model your actions after Jesus so you show yourself worthy of being the godly friend you should be.
Originally published June 13, 2025.
