We made a list of all persons we had harmed and became willing to make amends to them all.
Those closest to us cannot escape being harmed by the consequences of our actions. If we are married, our addictions are harmful to our marriage partners, even if we hate to admit it.
The Bible tells us that marriage should be a relationship that satisfies the needs of both partners. The apostle Paul wrote, "Submit to one another out of reverence for Christ. . . . Husbands ought to love their wives as they love their own bodies. For a man who loves his wife actually shows love for himself. No one hates his own body but feeds and cares for it, just as Christ cares for the church. And we are members of his body. As the Scriptures say, ‘A man leaves his father and mother and is joined to his wife, and the two are united into one.'. . . So again I say, each man must love his wife as he loves himself, and the wife must respect her husband" (Ephesians 5:21, 28-31, 33).
God says that our lives are literally intertwined with the lives of our mates. It may be a healthy union or a dysfunctional one. In either case, we're united. The behavior of one always affects the other. Any time we fail to break the bonds with our parents, fail to love sacrificially, or fail to show respect for our spouse, we are hurting them and ourselves. Surely, they have hurt us, too; but for now, we're dealing with our own issues.
The most important amends we face are with those to whom we are closest.
Taken from The Life Recovery Devotional: Thirty Meditations from Scripture for Each Step in Recovery by Stephen Arterburn and David Stoop. Copyright © 1991 by Stephen Arterburn and David Stoop. Used by permission of Tyndale House Publishers, Inc. All rights reserved.