Support without Enabling
"Dear brothers and sisters, if another believer is overcome by some sin, you who are godly should gently and humbly help that person back onto the right path. And be careful not to fall into the same temptation yourself." - (Galatians 6:1 NLT)
Thoughts for Today
Enabling can become a habit. Your loved one needs you to support their denial and deceit. They become expert at making you feel guilty if you try to stop your enabling behavior. They may say, "If you love me you'll . . ."
So what is your responsibility to your troubled loved one? You should be supportive—without enabling.
Consider This . . .
Think about the differences between enabling and supporting.
Enabler: Tries to fix
Supporter: Shows empathy
Enabler: Attempts to protect
Enabler: Repeatedly rescues
Supporter: Permits the person to be responsible for their own actions
Enabler: Attempts to control
Supporter: Lovingly confronts with truth
Supporter: Levels, speaks honestly
Enabler: Expects the other person to live up to "my" expectations
Supporter: Expects the other person to be responsible
Where do you see yourself?
Lord, I realize I often enable more than I support my loved one. Teach me to gently and humbly help them get back on the right path. In Jesus' name . . .
These thoughts were drawn from …
Close—But Not Too Closeby Dr. Jimmy Ray Lee. A complement to the Concerned Persons small group study, this booklet is written primarily for those who want to help someone close to them who is enslaved by the stronghold of a life-controlling issue. It is also designed to help someone who is suffering the consequences of a loved one's problem.
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